OK, was surfing the web for a bit and decided to go to the NY TImes as an offshoot site for once (not a NYTimes reader, but…), and what did I find?
So, this is what women really think equality is about? As a man, I don’t think this is really what makes people better, hooking up, casual sex, frivolous personal interaction, whatever, and you wonder why people are unsatisfied at some point in their lives.
We are monogamous beings by in large, this lack of personal interaction, this is one reason why people are coming into mental health care, because they don’t, won’t, or can’t figure out what they are looking for in relations. And NO DRUG will fix it, well, maybe a Viagra type med if there is real sexual dysfunction from a physiological point of view, but, this is another example of why American society is failing, and falsely turning to doctors to fix it with a chemical.
Grow up and pay attention folks, this is not what healthy, functional relations are about.
A couple of comments in the article to illuminate the stupidity at hand:
* “In such an overburdened college life, she said, it was rare for her and her friends to find a relationship worth investing time in, and many people avoided commitment because they assumed that someone better would always come along.”
* “But Elizabeth A. Armstrong, a sociologist at the University of Michigan who studies young women’s sexuality, said that women at elite universities were choosing hookups because they saw relationships as too demanding and potentially too distracting from their goals.
Increasingly, she said, many privileged young people see college as a unique life stage in which they don’t — and shouldn’t — have obligations other than their own self-development.”
this next 4 sentence bit was one I felt summed up what women really think makes them equal to men:
* “In the meantime, from A.’s perspective, she was in charge of her own sexuality.
“I definitely wouldn’t say I’ve regretted any of my one-night stands,” she said.
“I’m a true feminist,” she added. “I’m a strong woman. I know what I want.”
At the same time, she didn’t want the number of people she had slept with printed, and she said it was important to her to keep her sexual life separate from her image as a leader at Penn.”
and some more for “fun”:
* “In general, she said, she thought that guys at Penn controlled the hookup culture. But women played a role as well.
“It’s kind of like a spiral,” she said. “The girls adapt a little bit, because they stop expecting that they’re going to get a boyfriend — because if that’s all you’re trying to do, you’re going to be miserable. But at the same time, they want to, like, have contact with guys.” So they hook up and “try not to get attached.”
* “Dancing like that felt good but dirty, and like a number of girls, Haley said she had to be drunk in order to enjoy it. Women said universally that hookups could not exist without alcohol, because they were for the most part too uncomfortable to pair off with men they did not know well without being drunk. One girl, explaining why her encounters freshman and sophomore year often ended with fellatio, said that usually by the time she got back to a guy’s room, she was starting to sober up and didn’t want to be there anymore, and giving the guy oral sex was an easy way to wrap things up and leave.”
There is enough in the article to reinforce the points I am making here, as much as points dissenters of my position and florid supporters of this “do what you want, not what you need” mentality would shout out in defense, but, as I always say, you the reader read and decide what is your take home message.
Mine is simple, when you dumb down the importance of a belief or principle simply for easy gain or false rationalization, don’t be so surprised it bites you in the ass when it fails or has serious consequences. Some people will do well with this above mentality, but, most will not do so well. Go with your gut, your primary instincts. Relationships are tough, but they are satisfying and long standing if you do what is right and responsible.
Gee, and these women are from an alleged prestigious institution like Penn. Makes you wonder what these “bright minds” of our future generations will do for our country.
Oh, I know, get a woman President like Bill Clinton in office. Oh, that is already in the cards with his wife Hillary for 2016.
We get the electorate we deserve.
July 14 addendum: on cue from THE WEEK magazine, in the Noted section on page 14, seems to be icing on the cake of “egad-uality”–
“The number of American wives having extramarital affairs nearly doubled over the last two decades to 14.7%, while the number of men admitting to affairs stayed steady at 21 percent, according to a survey by the National Opinion Research Center. Sociologists say more women are cheating as they move into well paying jobs, and are less worried about the financial fallout of a divorce.”
Gee ladies, welcome to equality. Only in this case, I guess wanting to either be treated just like men, or looking for the same opportunities as men is getting a bit blurred to doing what is right, versus what is easy, convenient, or just downright stupid and immoral.
Welcome to the Men’s Club, ladies. Enjoy the membership.